URBAN DICTIONARY

Alaskan Bitch Slap:..........Right before your about to cum while your chick is giving you oral...pull your cock out and stick your hand out in front of it. Cum onto your hand then slap her in the face.

Anchovycunt:.............A foul smelling vagina. _EX._Did you get some from that bartime chick last night? No she had anchovycunt.

Assmosis : .............The process by which some people seem to absorb success by sucking up to the boss rather than working for it.

Banana Taco:............Word for sex..... EX. ..."Go over there and ask that blonde if you can order her a banana taco".

Barneyf*ck:............A sexual act performed while small children in another room are distracted by video entertainment. EX...Just got the new Dora video. It was amazing! We managed three barneyf*cks before Emily even asked for juice!

Beepilepsy :.............The brief siezure people sometimes suffer when their beepers go off, especially in vibrator mode. Characterized by physical spasms, goofy facial expressions, and stopping speech in mid-sentence.

Brodeo : ................A get-together or a party where the attendance is prodominantly male.

Butt Dial :................When your cell phone accidentally calls someone you did not mean to while in your pocket. I called her a fucktard. She heard cause my phone butt dialed her.

Cankles :..................The lack of articulation between some individual's calves and ankles.

Cowboy Up :...........When things are getting tough you have to get back up, dust yourself off and keep trying. Quit your bitching and be a man.

Crop Dusting :............Using the walking farts while transversing a cube farm, which often leads to praire dogging.

Cubefarm :................An office filled with cubicles.

Dead Tree Edition : ............The paper version of a publication available in both paper and electronic forms.

Defood:...........to throw up, vomit.

Dickmatized : .............When a girl is whipped over a guy for sex. Ex. Are you still dating Laura? Hell ya, I got her dickmatized.

Dick Trap:.............When a woman asks a man a question or suggestion that no matter how he answers or which choice he makes, he is in trouble, usually resulting in at least three days of abstinence.

Food Furniture:................Garnish or any part of prepared food that isn't meant to be eaten.

Generica:............Fast food joints, strip malls, sub-divisions as in “we were so lost in generica that I couldn’t remember what city it was”.

Grow A Tail : ..............The need to defecate, especially outdoors.

Husband Chair : ..............A chair in a womens' clothes/department store for a guy to sit in and wait while his wife or girlfriend shops.

Internuts:............The phenomenon that occurs when someone becomes a badass when addressing others on a message board.

Jump The Couch : ................To lose control of yourself, go crazy. An act of embarrasing yourself. Originating from Tom Cruise on Oprah.

Latex-intolerant:............What you tell a girl when she wants you to wear a condom.

Mouse Potato :............The online generation’s answer to the couch potato.

Nintendonitis :............A chronic painful condition that effects the muscles or joints in the hand, fingers and/or forearm after playing videogames too much.

NotFlix :................When you send a Netflix movie back without even watching it. EX.. My girlfriend ordered two more romantic comedies, so I NotFlixed them when they came in the mail.

Pope:............A holy dude with a cool hat and a bullet-proof golf cart.

Prairie Dogging :................When something loud happens in a cube farm, causing heads to pop up over the walls trying to see what’s going on.

Q-Tips:.................Old Retired people, they always have white hair, white shoes.

Rockstar Parking:.........A front row parking spot, such as near the front door of a tavern or illegal parking spots, such as on the sidewalk outside the door of a tavern.

Safety Buzz:.........Drinking alcohol so as to have an excuse for your actions in case you do something stupid later.

Sniper : ...........During doggystyle, pull out, moan in pleasure and spit on her back faking orgasm, continue stroking to finish the job. As she turns around shoot it at her face, aim for the eyes.

Starter Marriage:..............A short-lived first marriage that ends in divorce.

Stranger : ...............Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off. Eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else.

Umfriend :............One with whom one has a sexual relationship; as in, “this is Ashley, my...um...friend.”

Upper Decker : .............When you are at someones house you don't like, or better yet, your best buddies house, take a shit in the upper, tank part of the toilet. They will go insane looking for that awful stench. Strictly a classy move.

33 Percenter :............A female that claims to be a virgin yet only 33% of her mainstream sexual orifices remain pure. After experiencing oral and anal sex, how can one be considered any type of virgin?